December 9, 2012
It’s Six Sentence Sunday – which will be ending after January 2013, so you better get your sixes while they’re hot! ;)
I’m continuing with sentences from the opening of my Missing Gnomes story, with a slightly tweaked title.
First Six Second Six
For a moment Kinwer had actually thought he was seeing a baby, but no baby could have moved with such purpose or examined the stones with such authority. “Are you a…” he said, and ran out of words, because he didn’t have any clue what he was looking at. He’d never heard about gnomes before.
Gibbs looked up at him, skittered away around a boulder, then poked his head back out at Kinwer. “Are you a – a big man?” he asked, in a high, clear voice.
“Umm – I’m not a full grown man,” Kinwer said.
Thank you for any comments!
December 2, 2012
Hello friends, followers, and welcome back to Six Sentence Sunday. Last week I started with the opening to my new ‘Missing Gnomes’ manuscript, so I’m going to carry on. Thanks in advance for all your feedback.
It made him smile to think of the first time that he’d met Gibbs.
It had been nearly a year ago, and Kinwer had been wandering around. The pruning had been done and there weren’t that many birds to scare away from the fields. Kinwer’s best friend, Rayslo, had just left the village with his family, because Rayslo’s grandfather had died and left them his butcher’s shop in the city. Kinwer knew that Rayslo was having lots of exciting adventures in the big city, but thinking about that just made him lonelier.
And as he’d wandered around the hill, he’d spotted Gibbs – a tiny little figure like a baby just learning to walk, picking up the stones on the hillside and the riverbank and peering at each one closely.
November 25, 2012
Hello friends, followers, and fellow Six Sentence Sunday-ers. Thanks for all the great thoughts last week, and once again, I’m moving to a new piece! ‘The Snow Job’ is finished, yay! I’ve started a new manuscript to finish off November, and I may need to do some revision on it soon, because I want to submit sample chapters for it to the CSSF Novel Writer’s workshop in Kansas next year. So I’d love to hear what you all think about the opening scene!
Kinwer tried to look like he was actually about to do morning chores all the way through his father’s north wheat field. Once he was next to the fence he checked back at the farmhouse to see if any of his family was watching, ducked between the rails, waded across the stream, scrambled across the rocky ground and around the hill, and stopped at a mound of earth about as tall as his father. “Hello, Gibbs – I’m here.”
There was no answer. Kinwer circled around the mound, so that he was even less likely to be spotted by anybody from the farms near the village. He wanted to be patient for Gibbs’ sake, but he couldn’t wait here long.
I’ll send some friendly gnomes to visit everybody who leaves feedback! :)
November 18, 2012
Hey! I’m very grateful for all of the great comments I’ve gotten from this series of sixes from my Camp Nano unfinished novel “The Witches of Arion”, but I felt I needed to do something different this week. Before Sunday is over, I should reach fifty thousands words on my November Nano, “Snow Job”, so I’m going to share six sentences from the beginning:
Ryan caught sight of the snow drifts piled up against the dome wall, higher than he was tall, shuddered, and hurried down the street to the Smith’s house. He didn’t remember to knock until he’d already opened the lemon-yellow front door.
“Who’s… oh, hello there, Ryan,” Mrs Smith said, hurrying into the living room. “Scarlet isn’t here – I think she has classes at the college until seven.”
“I – well, I wanted to drop by and talk to you about a birthday party for her.”
Mrs Smith shook her head slightly, and made eye contact over Ryan’s shoulder – he took a quick look out of the corner of his eyes and realized that Mr Smith was standing on the front stairs, behind him.
Thanks in advance for any comments!
November 11, 2012
I’m doing great on NaNoWriMo, but Six Sentence Sunday continues. Nashua just told her parents that she’s going to be a witch…
First week Second week Third week Fourth week Fifth week Sixth week Seventh week Eighth week
Father dropped his cup. “What did you say, girl?” Mother burst into loud wails and sobs.
“Thank you very much, I enjoyed myself…”
“That’s – that’s a disgrace to our family at the best of times, but after seeing one of them humiliate your mother, and hearing how frightened she was? Do you hate her so much that you want to become one of her tormentors?”
Thanks in advance to anyone who comments.
November 4, 2012
Even NaNoWriMo can’t stop Six Sentence Sunday! Nashua and her mother got home from the fair, but all is not well in the town of Egya…
First week Second week Third week Fourth week Fifth week Sixth week Seventh week
By the end, when Mother told Father how Moon White had laid ‘the true name charm’ on her and forced her over to the fire, she was sniffling and crying just a little bit.
Father hummed over several bites, and turned to Nashua. “Well, girl, do you have anything to say to your mother?”
“Thank you very much for taking me to the fair, Mother. I’m going to be a witch someday!” The last part just sort of slipped out because she was so excited about it.
Thank you to everybody who comments!
October 28, 2012
Welcome back to Six Sentence Sunday! We’re still at Fox’s Fair, but things are getting dicey between Nashua’s arrogant mother and the witch known as Moon White, so Auntie pleads on Mom’s behalf…
First week Second week Third week Fourth week Fifth week Sixth week
“My sister was harsh and rude to you – but I apologize on her behalf. If you demand recompense or blood for her insult, then take it from me.”
Moon White stared at Lima for a moment, then snapped her fingers, and Mother sprang back from the fire, landing in a dusty heap, while some of the other fair-goers crowded near the pits laughed at her.
“I would not have let her hurt herself,” Moon White intoned. “I thank you for your apology, sister, and commend the courage of your offer. If I may do you a favor before I leave your town, come to me and ask – but for now, I must get back to my fortunes.”
Thanks to all who have given feedback, and I look forward to your comments! :)
October 21, 2012
Welcome back to Six Sentence Sunday.
Thanks to all who have read my sixes and/or given feedback. (Hopefully you haven’t given feedback without reading!) I’m going to skip ahead a little, to Nashua and her family meeting the witch from Fox’s Fair…
First week Second week Third week Fourth week Fifth week
“You should be more careful what you say around a witch – Lady Evelyn Berra Tirec.” Mother stiffened as the witch intoned her name. “Especially in a place like this – where there’s so many ways to hurt yourself.”
Mother got up stiffly from the table and walked around to the roasting pits. Nashua drew in a sharp breath when Mother bent down near to the largest fire.
“I beg you, Moon White – spare her,” Aunt Lima said, and the witch turned to look at her, as Mother stayed crouched down.
Thank you in advance for any comments!
October 14, 2012
Welcome back to Six Sentence Sunday.
Thanks to all who’ve commented on my sixes for ‘The Witches of Arion.’ Young Nashua is at Fox’s Fair with her mother, and the mother is getting into a confrontation with the little boy calling for customers to get their fortunes told by the witch – who’s the boy’s mother.
First week Second week Third week Fourth week
Mother’s cheeks wrinkled like she’d been stung by something little and nasty. “Listen, gutter boy, and listen well. My husband is on the Baron’s court – I can pay well if I’m pleased, or make life worse for your ‘mam’ if I’m not pleased. So when I say that I want to see the witch without going inside the tent, what do you answer me?”
Nashua saw the boy’s face go slightly pale after Mother said ‘make life worse’, and then he tried to hide it, but she new that Mother had spotted that too. “I’ll go have a talk with Mam and see if we can work something out,” he muttered.
This week, free ice cream to everybody who gives me feedback!
October 7, 2012
Welcome back to Six Sentence Sunday.
Thanks to all who’ve commented on my sixes for ‘The Witches of Arion.’ Young Nashua is at Fox’s Fair with her mother, and the two of them got into a battle of wills over whether or not to visit the witch’s tent and get their fortune told.
First week Second week Third week
Mother looked around, then strode up to the calling boy. “Listen here – we’re not going into that little tent with the witch, hidden from sight where she can do anything she wants. Will there be a show somewhere else?”
“Listen, me mam likes her privacy,” the boy said. “She’s not going to be performing up on the stage like she’s an acrobat. You don’t wanta go in, fine – we’re doing good business without yah.”
Thanks very much for any feedback!