Six Sentence Sunday – The Shuttle 6

June 10, 2012

First six. Second six. Third six. Fourth six. Fifth six.

Thanks for all of your comments last week. A mysterious passenger has just confronted Dara in the cockpit about their dangerous predicement…

“Good afternoon, Captain Klein,” he said. “I thought about asking to meet you earlier in the flight, but you looked as if you had enough on your mind. I’m Lieutenant Commander Simon Twain, Star Patrol.”

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you, Commander. But I’m sorry to say that I’ve got more on my mind than ever, so I don’t exactly think that this is the best time for the social niceties…”

“Then I’ll get straight to business,” Twain said, before she could finish the brush-off.

Any comments very gratefully appreciated! I’m actually working on revisions of ‘The Shuttle’ this weekend, to submit it for an in-depth critiquing at the CSSF workshop later this month.


Six Sentence Sunday – The Shuttle 5

June 3, 2012

First six. Second six. Third six. Fourth six.

Thanks very much for all your comments so far. I’m going to skip over some routine emergency procedures stuff and pick up where things start to go off procedure.

Dara kept busy asking for more information on the Rescue and Recovery timeline, checking on their orbital status and all the ship’s systems other than the main engine. She was taken by surprise when an unfamiliar figure signaled at the cockpit door. That tall, dark man wasn’t in the cabin crew, but he moved with some authority in free-fall.

Instead of pressing any panic buttons, Dara let the door slide open. “Can I help you, sir?”

Mister dark-skinned and handsome floated smoothly through the cockpit hatch.

Thanks in advance for your comments!


Six Sentence Sunday – The Shuttle 4

May 27, 2012

First six. Second six. Third six.

Thanks so much for the comments so far! There’s just been an accident on a routine flight up to a commuter space station. The engines are dead and the ship is stranded in a slightly unstable orbit…

“When will Orbital Rescue get here?” a woman in an expensive designer dress demanded from one of the most comfortable seats.

“We haven’t been given exact ETA, but I’m expecting a rendezvous in approximately four and a half hours.”

“I’ll miss my connection,” an older man said, and others near him started to grumble.

Ronny, the Chief Purser, chimed in at this point. “On behalf of the company, I apologize for the delay and inconvenience. Southwest Orbital Transit and your next carriers will do everything that they can to get you on your way with a minimum of disruption.”

Thanks very much for any feedback you can give me!


Six Sentence Sunday – The Shuttle 3

May 20, 2012

First six. Second six.

Dara is the pilot on a routine space shuttle trip, which has just become less than routine:

Something must have leaked just enough heat into the fuel tank for one piece of Fracture to detonate early, and that set off a chain reaction.

Dara sighed and started the emergency procedures. This was not going to be an ordinary milk run.

“There is no need to be concerned,” Dara said to the passengers and the cabin crew over the shuttle’s video screens. “Our engines are down, except for the small docking jets which will not be enough to get us to a stable orbit. However, we have six hours before our orbit will decay significantly, and Orbital Rescue and Recovery has been notified.”

Again, any feedback would be much appreciated, and thanks!


Six Sentence Sunday – The Shuttle 2

May 13, 2012

First six.

I just set the scene so far – Dara is a somewhat bored space pilot on a shuttle run up to Astris station…

Ever since they’d discovered hyperspace travel, there was more and more shuttle travel from the surface up to Astris, the main way-station for travellers that would be going even further. But Dara had never even been to the moon…

Suddenly the cockpit shook, and several status panels on her screen went bright red. She pushed a few commands to find out more details about the problem, and ended up staring at an exterior view of the main fuel tank.

There was metallic debris floating away, wreckage from a large crater that had blasted out from inside the ship, and also milky translucent faceted rocks – her remaining fuel supply. Fracture was the most efficient propellant ever invented, but it was also unstable.

Again, thank you very much for any comments and feedback!


Six Sentence Sunday – The Shuttle 1

May 6, 2012

Okay, I’m starting a new short story as of this week, a science fiction drama piece.

Dara checked all the displays as the sky outside the window faded from blue towards black. Everything within tolerance, including the important graph of altitude versus time; she was exactly on pace with the company schedule. “Eleven o’clock milk run, San Diego to Astris station. At least I’m a good milk run pilot.”

Dara pressed a few buttons on the control board to bring up a telescope view of her destination. Astris looked the same as ever, an irregular cylinder with stumpy projections spinning in deep space as it rotated.

Thanks for any feedback, guys! 🙂